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Cats vs Dogs – Indoor Cats Became Outdoor Cats

The Dutch Man left the door open and Cosmo and I saw our chance to finally be outdoor cats.  Mother insists that it’s not safe, but it was gorgeous outside and there were fields of green grass begging for my paws to sink in.  First I went out, then Cosmo followed.  “God Speed, My Friend,” I said and then I turned and went on my way.  It was heaven.  Mother didn’t even notice that we had made our escape.  Of course The Dutch Man didn’t notice.  I bet he’d notice poop in his shoe.

But I digress.

I had a lovely time smelling the smells, sinking in to the ground, reveling in being a outdoor cat when I got a little hungry.  And thirsty.  Fortunately I heard Mother’s voice and crawled out from beneath the bush to greet her.  The shock on her face was classic.  “Jaffrey,” she said, as if the neighborhood is teaming with black and white tuxedo cats.  I was about to say this when I noticed that she wasn’t alone.  Those damn heathens were with her.

They about gave me a heart attack, forcing me, an indoor cat with a bit of junk in the trunk, to run for dear life for fear of being licked to death.  They were rounded up and removed and The Dutch Man politely helped me from the bush I was in.  How humiliating.  When I realized that the dogs weren’t around, I decided that I may as well take a moment to get one in.  I made the mistake of vocalizing my glee at the idea of sinking a claw into The Dutch Man and he reacted quickly, releasing me.  I darted beneath the house to sit guard with Cosmo, who never came out.

Several hours later, Mother had convinced me to come out.  Cosmo, the traitor, came out willingly after being coaxed by treats.  He was inside relaxing when I came in, covered in cobwebs and pissed off.

There will be another day.

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